ripe nj peach

you are heavier than i thought you would be
the weight of your flesh sinks into my palm
a stark contrast to the fleecy satin
you wear like a wanton nymph

i pierce your skin and take you
creating a circle
through which i espy your insides
their color screams surprised
hot pink surrounding your core
bleeding out into a shade of yellow so charged

i place you down in front of me
just to savor the way you look right now
infinite shades of flesh tones
yellow pink purple red
muted by your velvety sheen

and all that's left of you at the end
reveals the rugged surface of your heart
a few threads of your flesh
clinging there to remind me of your splendor
the sly smile of summer

love, love, love

6 years of aching down to my soul

scratching through all the stories I’ve told

choices that I never made

time I couldn’t have laid to waste

what is now but the sum of then

brings me later the same again

circles etched in stony fear

held fast my heart all too near

awakenings in fits and starts

fruition but too long apart

how is it that perspective holds

just long enough to suffer cold

tears couldn’t break the glass

what brought me shattered shards at last

was love, love the kind you don’t see

love, love spirit give it to me

my hands won’t break it this time, I swear

I’m only holding on to how I care

Take it all and spray it on

Everything that’s come and gone

Love, love, love

There are 360 infinite degrees

For possibilities of a vantage point

A myriad of colors to lend their perspective

As you perceive this life given

A Mind lends it’s own hues

Shades things a bit more grey

Perhaps some slate

Consternation fogs the glass

A Heart closed affords patterns

Refraction, reflection and distortion

Making for a confusing view

Inconsistency and no telling really

A Heart opening allows moments of girth

Views seen through a wider lens

Colored lightly with yellows and greens

Bleeding gently to mollify the convolution

Would that I could see with a heart open

Imagine the lookout there

Warm browns, deep greens and glittering silvers

Pain but a game, pleasure but a gift.

and then

Perception the spaces

Flying just below dim

Dizzying cartwheels on the lawn

We just caught our breath

Long enough for more

Loneliness figures out

Hiding without constraint

Beleaguered loosely

Without purpose

Tease me in the present time

Make my life hell just for a moment

Take my dignity and squeeze it

Until it bleeds down on your toes

The moment is stretched for a lifetime

Imprints and chemicals

Perpetuation defined

Of the ghosts in the machines

here & now

knowing that all the choices

made themselves for pain

is a wanton pill to swallow.

push on through, soldier.

happy face today,

smiling legs tomorrow.

the black hole won't go away,

though,

till you are wont to accept that it is.

given birth by those choices,

the vacuum kept alive

by this denial.

what is the fastest way out?

the see-saw thrashes wildly,

jams me into the ground.

scatter

skidding over puddles on the palms of my hands
feet straight up and back
gliding over murky and dark
teeth bared, staying on top.

dip below, what's to be found?
creatures creating endless patterns
replicating themselves
swimming and squirming in their infinite grooves.

but alas, the fear subsides beneath the surface.
seems that watching the writhing from outside
might just be worse than getting in their way.
the harm they purport
is but a function of the path they maintain.

what is

i have been through the depths of hell,

for they are in my mind.
i have felt the ecstasy of heaven,

for it is there in my mind.

but have i been to reality?
have i breathed in the here and now?
it is the hardest place to find
for it lies outside my mind.

what does fantasy look like?

a porous net of insect wings
suspended corners
hanging middle
through it flows a liquid,
viscous and bright red.

this is the life-blood,
the energy of existence
and of presence.
it would be a thick flow,
an uninterrupted column
but for the diaphanous net.

life-force is caught and held,
pooled on the delicate wings
of gossamer fantasy.
it's only impeding your life,
let it go.